By CARLEY RONEY, Scripps Howard News Service

Ask Carley: How to handle a wedding buffet

Q: We are having a buffet reception. What's the best way to get everyone fed quickly without creating long lines?

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Ask Carley: Who signs bridal shower thank-you notes?

Q: When writing thank-you cards for a bridal shower, how should they be signed: by just the bride or the bride and groom?

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Ask Carley: Wedding insurance

Q: It's been months since I've had any contact with my DJ, and I'm getting worried since my wedding is two months away! I'm obviously going to look for a new DJ, but what do I do about getting my deposit back?

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Ask Carley: Getting married at home

Q: We can't afford a wedding at a hall, so we're having an at-home wedding. What should we know?

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Ask Carley: Make your own enclosures for pre-made wedding invites

Q: I want to buy pre-made invites, but I want to make response and direction cards myself to save some money. Is it OK if they don't look exactly the same as the invites?

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Ask Carley: Don't reserve tables for certain wedding guests

Q: I want to reserve five tables for certain guests and let everyone else choose where they sit. My mom insists on making a seating chart. Who's right?

A: We have to side with your mom on this one. Reserving tables for select guests will actually cause you more stress -- the people you leave off the ''special'' tables may take offense.

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Ask Carley: A wedding-invite race

Q: My cousin just got engaged and is planning her wedding for the same month as mine. I'm worried that our family won't travel twice within a few weeks. Can I ask her to change her date?

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Ask Carley: Kissing in public

Q: My fiance doesn't feel comfortable kissing in front of our guests at the end of the ceremony. (It's considered impolite in his culture.) How can we end the ceremony in a way that wouldn't leave guests shouting out, "Kiss her!"

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Ask Carley: It's OK to read your vows at ceremony

Q: My fiance and I are writing our own vows. Can we read them off paper at our ceremony?

A: Of course you can! You'll already be so nervous about speaking in front of friends and family that no one expects you to memorize your lines as though you were in a play.

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Ask Carley: Don't tell guests not to wear white at the wedding

Q: What's a polite way for me to let my guests know that I want to be the only one wearing white at my wedding?

A: There's no polite way to do this, so don't. No rule says that only the bride can wear white at a wedding, but there's sort of an unspoken rule about this, and most guests are happy to oblige.

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