The Top Boneheaded Performances on TV

We've all had those moments. We're all highly trained, skilled athletes and -- in a display of premature celebration -- we fumble the ball away a split-second before an important touchdown in a critical professional football game.On second thought, maybe only the Philadelphia Eagles' DeSean Jackson can claim that distinction.But Jackson is certainly not alone in making incredibly stupid decisions in front of an unforgiving, global audience.Here is our highly unscientific list of the Top Boneheaded Performances on TV.Rippin' on the popeSinead O'Connor (Oct. 3, 1992) -- The music guest on "Saturday Night Live" that week, O'Connor sang a version of Bob Marley's "War," then tore up a photo of Pope John Paul II while singing the word "evil." Sure, her music career took a nosedive three seconds after it happened. But it was totally worth it, right, Sinead? (Now, about that haircut?...)The Dean screamHoward Dean (Jan. 19, 2004) -- His voice shredded from a nasty bout with the flu -- and his ego bruised by an unexpected third-place finish in the 2004 Iowa Democratic caucuses -- Dean's primal scream during a rally shocked the media and supporters. Did it also effectively end his presidential campaign? "Yeeeahhh!"Supersized nip-slipJanet Jackson and Justin Timberlake (Feb. 1, 2004) -- During the Super Bowl halftime show, Timberlake ripped off part of Jackson's outfit and out popped her bare breast on live TV. The fallout: Outraged feds slapped a half-million-dollar fine on CBS -- until the courts restored sanity and threw it out years later. Far worse than a flash of nipple: the phrase "wardrobe malfunction," which is used about every three seconds in normal conversation.Out of lip synchAshlee Simpson (Oct. 24, 2004) -- When the wrong track of her voice started playing on "Saturday Night Live," it was pretty obvious Simpson wasn't singing live. Busted! Flustered, she walked offstage to cry. Her career became one big joke, though she has since regained some respect. At least she hasn't given up on pop and gone country, right, Sis?Where's the Cruise control?Tom Cruise (May 23, 2005) -- The man went totally bonkers jumping on Oprah's couch, proclaiming his love for young Katie Holmes. Publicity stunt? Well, yeah, though TomKat did end up getting married. That episode played right into controversial comments on Scientology and postpartum depression, and now nobody's jumping for joy over Cruise's lackluster career. Rebound impossible.Heck of a gaffe, Mr. PresidentGeorge W. Bush (Sept. 2, 2005) -- Just days after his director of the Federal Emergency Management Agency botched the handling of the response to Hurricane Katrina's strike on New Orleans and the Gulf Coast, President Bush praised Michael Brown with the infamous phrase "Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job!" in front of hordes of news cameras. Brown would resign in disgrace 10 days later. You'd think being an officer with the International Arabian Horse Association would prepare a person for such abuse.Comeback another timeBritney Spears (Sept. 9, 2007) -- Her performance on MTV's "Video Music Awards" was supposed to be her big comeback after some hair-shaving crazy moments, but instead she looked like nobody told her she was going to perform on national TV in her bra and panties. Flash forward to this year's VMAs, when she got a standing ovation and three awards. Ah, but she didn't perform. Smart move.(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service www.scrippsnews.com)