ShareThisHi, Jewel,What is a reasonable curfew for a Grade 12 girl?My parents don't let me go out during the week and on Fridays and Saturdays I have to be home by 11:30. I don't think it's fair because my friends stay out later.How can I win this fight?-- EARLY BIRDDear E.B.,I can relate to your frustrations. I, too, grew up with overprotective parents. In hindsight, I now realize their hearts were in the right place. They were simply trying to protect me. I'm willing to bet your folks harbor similar feelings about you.Right now, your objective should be to prove that you're a responsible teen. In turn, you'll have more bargaining power with Mom and Dad.Start by hitting the books hard. Take part in extracurricular activities. Volunteer for a good cause. Keep up with your chores.Next, put your folks' minds at ease. Give them the opportunity to get to know your friends. Enroll in a self-defense class. Build a relationship with your family.Accept that your parents aren't going to change overnight. You've got to learn to meet them halfway. Don't ask to stay out late every weekend, but rather seek permission for special events.If your parents give you the green light, then you should use these outings to relax their minds even further. Call during the evening to check in, and to say everything is fine.Don't lose your cool if you still have misunderstandings. A temper tantrum will only propel you backward. You don't want that.Remember: Comparing yourself with other people isn't healthy. Everyone's life circumstances are different. Work on bettering yourself, and good things will follow.-- Love, JewelHi, Dave,I'm starting to lose my friends because they're getting more interested in hanging out with girls. I'm 13 and I like girls, but I like hanging out with guys, playing sports and stuff.Now, when I say we should go throw a football around for a while, they say they're going over to some girl's house instead. How do I compete with that?-- GETTING LONELYDear GETTING LONELY,It's not about competing with girls, but realizing how interacting with the opposite sex should complement your socializing. It's only natural that boys will want to hang with girls sometime. Don't get too pessimistic about it. I'm sure there will be times when your buddies want to play sports. Thing is, they might not want to play catch all the time.And if you're really interested in sports, why not join a league? You'll be associating with guys who play sports regularly, so that will satisfy your itch in some respect. Then again, perhaps you miss your friends, who are drifting away slowly. That's a natural thing.If this situation is bothering you a lot, let your friends know. I always recommend straight-up communication when you got something burning on your mind, even if it may cause a mini-argument. So what? At least you'll be able to let your friends now that you enjoy their company and want to relive the good ol' days.(Got a hot question for our cool columnists? E-mail Jewel or Dave at submissions(at)ypp.net or check them out at www.ypp.net.)(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, http://www.scrippsnews.com)
Dealing with a curfew ... Missing his friends
Submitted by SHNS on Wed, 04/23/2008 - 16:23
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