Seek new goals ... Pals not big on serious talks

Hi, Jewel,My dad is really into time management, and he wants me to be also. He tells me I waste so much time watching TV and listening to music.The trouble is, I like watching TV and listening to music. My school marks are good and I'm not causing him any grief with drugs, relationships or anything else.He says I should have at least one goal for each day. Aren't I too young for all this structure? I'm 17.-- UNSTRUCTUREDDear Unstructured,Um, hello? You're totally NOT giving yourself enough credit. Case in point: Your signoff. As a good student, you obviously have respect for deadlines. That, my dear, takes constant "structuring" of priorities. You've obviously got this down.Secondly, you're standing at the brink of adulthood at age 17. Yes, you're still young, but at the same time you're about to plunge into new waters. Read: You've got to prepare to be balanced.I honestly don't think your dad is trying to be a structuring cop. Slipping one goal into your daily routine is really no biggie. It can actually make life more interesting.Think about it. Right now, you're escaping through TV and music. However, there's a whole world out there. Dedicating an hour of your day to other goodies will give you a multilayered spin on things.Begin by making a list of potential experiences you'd like to uncork. It could involve reading that best seller you heard about. Perhaps you can jazz up your exercise routine with a new workout. You may want to look into volunteering to help out a cause. Or you can finish up that art project you forgot about.Share these fresh developments with your dad. It'll help ease his mind when it comes to your growth as a human being. Use this opportunity to get to know your father. Ask about his goals, and what he's learning through the motions.Remember: Honest dialogue has the power to wipe out misunderstandings.-- Love, JewelHi, Dave,How come guys don't talk about serious things like relationships? I can have a good talk with some of the girls I know, but guys don't seem to want to go there.I'm going to college in the fall and I'm wondering if guys there will be different. Do you think they will?-- SERIOUS GUYDear SERIOUS GUY,First, it's wrong to stereotype all guys. Many dudes I know can talk deeply about relationships or philosophy or religion. But you're right in thinking that high-school guys might not want to pursue higher enlightenment, especially when there's pressure to be "cool" or conform to the status quo.In college, you should feel at home. Students want to learn more than what they were taught in high school, and I think that thirst for knowledge extends to extracurricular conversations. You'll find friends who want to talk about the complexities of relationships, the social layers behind dating. It's just a matter of you getting acquainted with the right people.Some guys might not "talk serious" at first, especially in group settings. But when alone, guys can offer many intriguing thoughts about various matters. Sometimes it's just a matter of finding one-on-one time.(Got a hot question for our cool columnists? E-mail Jewel or Dave at submissions(at)ypp.net or check them out at www.ypp.net.)(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, http://www.scrippsnews.com)