Clinton, Obama squabble; McCain waits

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WASHINGTON -- So, why don't Barack Obama and Hillary Rodham Clinton just high-five each other, go after "Old Man McCain" together and run on a joint ticket to put Democrats back in charge at the White House?Ah, if only politics were that un-egomaniacal.Truth is, the two senators don't really like each other much these days. It has nothing to do with policy -- basically, they vote alike on most big issues. It has nothing to do with where they'd take the country -- anywhere President Bush would not. It has nothing to do with their qualifications, their personalities or their life stories.But Clinton can't believe that an upstart senator, new on the national stage, challenged her when she had a chance to be the FIRST WOMAN PRESIDENT, for heaven's sake. And Obama can't understand why, when he's finally got Democrats excited, for pity's sake, she's standing in the way of his being the FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT.So they will snipe at each other all spring and all summer and, most likely, end up at their national convention in Denver in August. There they will fight for a few hundred superdelegates (party bigwigs). And everyone else will watch in exasperation as two talented politicians try to destroy each other. If we learned anything in the last month, it's that going negative does work.Meanwhile, John McCain will be assuring conservatives he can be as conservative as they want him to be. He'll be raising money alongside Bush's self-described "pretty face." He'll be disparaging -- politely, of course, -- that inexperienced, quarrelsome youngster, Obama, and that strident, meddlesome, "far-left" woman, Clinton. And he'll be campaigning flat-out for the votes of the homeless Reagan Democrats who've been wandering in the desert.McCain will also be looking for a running mate who is younger than he is; experienced enough to take over the presidency in a catastrophe; and able to deliver a significant segment of the voters McCain needs but can't be assured of getting on his own.Frustrated Democrats can't believe they might lose a chance to win the White House despite an unpopular war, a weakened economy, environmental challenges, children who aren't learning as much as children elsewhere on the globe and a nation now widely hated abroad. Some say they wish Clinton and Obama could come to an understanding.But few in either camp say it will happen. She wants her name first; he does not want his name second. And neither will quit while there's a chance of winning.Obama is not likely to want to be third fiddle while Clinton is the virtuoso and Bill Clinton is strolling around the White House as her chief adviser. If he loses, Obama goes back to the Senate and runs again down the road or becomes a senior statesman. Hillary Clinton, who already knows what being No. 2 at the White House is like, won't do it again. And this is her last shot at being president.There is a solid tradition in this country of nominees picking also-rans to run with them even when they don't like each other. Most notably, John F. Kennedy tapped Lyndon Johnson. Most recently, John Kerry in 2004 chose rival John Edwards to be on the slate. (And this year Kerry endorsed not Edwards but Obama.)Clinton slyly suggested that she might consider Obama as a running mate without actually saying anything that could commit her. Right now, her dukes are up, and she's not going there. Obama bristles at the thought.Bush declared the other day that nobody votes for the ticket solely because of the vice-presidential candidate. That probably includes even the veep-wannabe's mother.So, it's on to Pennsylvania, which hasn't had a primary say in years. But the Keystone State won't end this weirdly wonderful spectacle, either. On April 23, we'll say on to Denver!(Scripps Howard columnist Ann McFeatters has covered the White House and national politics since 1986. E-mail amcfeatters(at)nationalpress.com.)(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, www.scrippsnews.com.)