Inexpensive first dates ... do's and don'ts

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In honor of Valentine's Day, here are some answers to several questions relating to teenage love and romance. Find out how to have a fun and inexpensive date, how to spot the symptoms of budding love and the best way to woo your first crush. The first three responses are from Dave and the next three are from Jewel.Q: How should you approach your crush?A: I'd recommend being straight up and confident: Tell her or him that you're interested and that you would like to go on a date. How about Saturday night? You don't have to get all gooey and explain why the earth revolves around your crush; let there be a bit of mystery, so the love of your life can be intrigued by who you are. You can do something romantic, too, like surprise your crush with an unexpected gift. Anything is better than silence.Q: Do you have any suggestions for an inexpensive but fun first date?A: There are lots of date choices that won't break the bank. Here are a few suggestions: take a walk in an unexplored neighborhood in your community; get a campfire going outside city limits and roast some marshmallows together; go to an art gallery or museum on their discounted days; stay at home and play board games or cards; or, my personal favorite, go to a poetry or spoken word performance at a cafe. You'd be surprised how often some poetry can stir up some romance!Q: What are a few do's and don'ts for a teenage guy in love.A: It's important for you to love yourself first before sharing that passion with anyone else. Be comfortable in your own skin. Second, a guy should be considerate and caring in everything he does in a relationship, with special attention paid to being unselfish. Also, guys aren't as expressive as women, and I've noticed girls like it when guys can say what's in their minds and hearts.Q: What shouldn't you do?A: Don't treat the relationship casually, and don't opt for the bad-boy role (even though some guys think it's a good idea). Don't embarrass yourself in front of her friends or family to get a laugh. Don't say things without meaning them. Don't just say "I love you;" prove it in your actions. And finally, don't take the relationship or the girl for granted -- value her presence every time you see her, and show her how much she means to you.Q: Can teenagers really be in love?A: Hmm. This is a toughie! As a teen, your sexual hormones are in full bloom mode. Consequently, there's a good chance you may be swallowed by sizzling lust and/or intense infatuation. However, this doesn't mean teens can't love sincerely. F.Y.I.: They can. Hello? I know plenty of married couples who chirp about their blissful union as "high school sweethearts." But, yes, with maturity, your understanding of love skyrockets in value.Q: What are the symptoms of young love?A: Wait a sec! This question is ageist. Love symptoms--or even telltale signs of infatuation -- don't differ based on passport birthdates. Read: Symptoms of the heart are universal. So, how can you tell if you're in love? Simple. You'll respect this person. You'll desire communication. You'll care about his or her well-being. Note: Relationships are a two-way street. Any sort of imbalance (distrust, one-sided love, neglect of other life responsibilities, etc.) spells trouble indeed.Q: What's the best way to deal with the ups and downs of a major crush?A: You like somebody. Okay, A LOT. Now what? If you want to start dating this person, you've got to build a connection first. Slowly. Get involved in mutually appealing activities. Find ways to chitchat. Offer sincere compliments. Be yourself. Eventually, invite him/her on a date when you're feeling good vibes. The outcome isn't important. Rather, credit yourself for trying. Inaction and suppressed feelings are unhealthy. Remember, this crush shouldn't define you. Lead a full life. Be whole!(Got a hot question for our cool columnists? E-mail Jewel or Dave at writeus(at)ypp.net or check them out on-line at http://www.ypp.net. For more stories visit scrippsnews.com)