Trimming the guest list

By CARLEY RONEY
Scripps Howard News Service
Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Q: We're trying to cut down our guest list. I have a group of relatives who I almost never talk to (in fact, we haven't been in touch for over a year). Do we have to invite them just because they're family?

A: This is a tough one -- while it's easy to draw the haven't-talked-to-in-a-year line with friends or acquaintances, it's definitely not as simple when it comes to relatives. The best solution is to decide on a cutoff point and stick with it -- for example, aunts, uncles and first cousins only. It's tough but fair.

Another thing to consider: You say you're distant from them, but does your mom or dad talk to these folks on a regular basis? Though you might consider them safe to cut, you might risk upsetting your parents. If it's just too troublesome to cut your relatives from the guest list, consider trimming another group, say, co-workers or your single friends' dates.

(Carley Roney, co-founder and editor in chief of The Knot, the nation's leading wedding resource, advises millions of brides on modern wedding etiquette at www.theknot.com.)

(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, http://www.scrippsnews.net)