By GREGG PATTON
Friday, February 02, 2007
I've never been to a Prince press conference before, but after Thursday, I would recommend them to all my friends.
In fact, I'd give it a 9 out of 10 because you can dance to it.
The enigmatic rock star will provide the halftime entertainment at the Super Bowl. At the bequest of the NFL, he showed up for the now-standard pre-game media session to not answer any questions.
Prince doesn't really do press conferences _ at least not in the traditional sense. I'm presuming, of course, that Indianapolis coach Tony Dungy won't appear at his next press gathering in an all-orange costume, with platinum jewelry, and backed up by two sexy twin dancers, a female singer, two keyboard players, a guitarist and a horn section.
I've been going to press conferences almost all of my adult life. This is the first one where reporters kept time with their toes. You half expected someone two rows in front of you to roll up something illegal in his notebook paper and fire it up. I thought a few reporters might hold their ballpoint pens over their heads and flick them when the press conference was over.
Instead of sitting on stage answering "Who are you rooting for in the Super Bowl?" and "Did you play football in high school?" the 48-year-old icon of American pop culture made a deal that the NFL _ and several hundred sportswriters _ could live with. He would play three songs.
But not before he teased the packed room.
"Contrary to rumor, I'd like to take a few questions right now," Prince said upon taking the stage with his band mates.
A much-too-eager fellow jumped up and got only one word out. Prince had already turned his back. He slammed his right hand across his guitar strings, prompting the band into a raucous cover of "Johnny B. Goode."
I guess that's the way a musician says, "Don't bring that garbage into my house, scribe sucker!"
Anyway, Prince also did his own songs, "Anotherloverholenyohead" and "Get On The Boat."
My favorite move was when one of the twins slid in between Prince and his guitar. He wrapped his left arm around her, smiled that salacious Prince smile, re-gripped the frets and kept on rocking.
I wonder if maybe I could reposition my laptop, stretch my left arm out and ... yeah, right.
Prince is supposed to be part of the NFL's recovery program from its infamous Janet Jackson halftime incident. You remember _ the bare breast that launched a thousand Federal Communications Commission restrictions.
After that, the NFL decided to rein in its Super Bowl entertainment. First came Paul McCartney, then the Rolling Stones, both onetime legends of rebelliousness who had aged themselves into respectability. A couple of acts that _ please, Lord, don't strike me down for this baby boomer blasphemy _ sure know how to put the rock in rocking chair.
Prince is another guy whose zenith, let's face it, is behind him. He is a six-time Grammy winner, but his most popular music and movie _ the "Purple Rain" era _ are two decades old. Maybe that's why the NFL viewed him as another safe bet. I mean, they must have wondered just how wild and crazy he could be. He just composed an award-winning song for the 2006 animated film "Happy Feet."
But I don't know. He's still oozing that edgy, androgynous sensuality. And he still sounds a lot like the guy whose music way back in 1985 was the initial inspiration for Tipper Gore _ then a senator's wife _ to mount her campaign to make the ears of American youth safe from explicitly sexual lyrics.
It's a wonder the NFL didn't tap anthem singer Billy Joel for halftime and wait another 20 years for Prince's libido to slow down to waltz time.
Joel did his own press conference (the usual kind where you answer questions) and seemed eminently ready for the gentler years.
Joel is no longer the thin, achingly charming Piano Man. When someone suggested he was beginning to look, well, older and wondered if he would have any new music out soon, Joel was blunt but seemingly not the least bit offended.
"Look, I ain't no matinee idol," he said, and as far as a new CD is concerned, "I don't feel like writing one."
OK! You've passed the audition! Do you do halftimes?
But, no, the NFL will roll the dice. Joel will warble "The Star-Spangled Banner," watch Indianapolis and Chicago play football for 30 minutes, then turn the stage over to Prince.
Frankly, Prince doesn't strike me as any more predictable than he was when he changed his name to a cross-like symbol and became "The Artist Formerly Known As Prince" in order to punish his record company with which he was battling.
He is Prince once again, of course, and if I were the NFL, I'd keep a close watch on him. I'd keep a team of security guards ready. And just to be sure, I'd suggest banning the dancing twins _ perhaps to press seating where we'd be happy to keep an eye on them for the NFL, the FCC and the good of a more wholesome America.
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