ShareThisFirst, there was "Paul is dead." Then, there was "Elvis lives."
Now, it's "Where's Suri?"
Yes, Suri Holmes Cruise is joining the ranks of Paul McCartney and Elvis Presley as the subject of wild and widespread conspiracy theories, with speculation having reached a fever pitch about whether this 3-month-old baby actually exists.
Tongues started wagging well before Suri's much-debated birth, when bloggers and, well, the whole world, started to question the veracity of everything from daddy's fertility to mommy's state of mind to the effects of Scientology on their progeny.
Throughout it all, Tom Cruise has been enthusiastic to the point of scariness, Katie Holmes has been strangely silent _ and the rumors have continued to multiply like bad sequels.
Then came Suri's birth on April 18, after which Cruise made several beaming speeches about his daughter's health and beauty and then ... nothing.
Neither Cruise nor Holmes have been much in the spotlight since, and pictures of the baby have yet to be splashed, Shiloh-style, across every magazine, as has the offspring of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt.
And seeing as we've already seen Moses (Martin, son of Gwyneth Paltrow), Kingston (Rossdale, Gwen Stefani's boy) and Grier (Henchy, Brook Shields' daughter who was born the same day as Suri), Suri's absence is all the more glaring.
Of course, a new-kid-clam-up isn't new to Cruise, who successfully kept his two kids with former wife Nicole Kidman out of the limelight for years. Still, given the inordinately public nature of the Cruise-Holmes courtship, there's nothing left to say but, 'What gives?'
Here's a roundup of what other celebrity watchers are saying and blogging:
_ US Weekly: The mag has been featuring a countdown on its Web site, tallying the days and minutes that we've been living a Suri-less existence, the rumor being that no one was willing to meet the alleged $3 million starting price for photos.
_ Pink Is The New Blog: This blogger has said that Holmes has been faking the appearance of pregnancy via a large pillow or, perhaps, a beach ball.
_ Perez Hilton: This saucy blog muses that Holmes has been brainwashed and kept prisoner by Cruise and his Scientology buddies; that her baby is an alien, and that we should all be afraid, very afraid.
_ Jossip: The word here is that Suri is as fake as George Hamilton's tan, and that if she really does exist, Cruise is the father as much as Michael Jackson begat his little Prince.
_ D-Listed: This potty-mouthed blogger believes that Suri is a figment of Cruise's imagination or is actually just a Starbucks cup _ the only thing Holmes has been seen cradling.
(Lisa Heyamoto can be reached at lheyamoto(at)sacbee.com.)
(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, www.scrippsnews.com.)
