Schmildren of Men

People are falling all over themselves proclaiming its greatness. TV ad quote stooges have proclaimed it the next "Blade Runner." Word has it Ricky Bobby is saying it beat out "Highlander" to win the Oscar for best movie ever.

Sorry, but "Children" is no "Highlander." It's a slow-rolling, half-baked sci-fi chase film that isn't even able to tell a complete story. I think what may be attracting people to rally around the film is support of its social messages, which decry society's degradation into a police state, as well as the knee-jerk persecution of illegal immigration. Not exactly bold stands, but easy to rally around, I guess. Someone should make a movie that proclaims "Kicking puppies is cruel!" or "Murder is inconsiderate!"

At least the Directors Guild of America - whose awards are the most accurate indicator as to which films will get Oscar nominations - didn't fall for the trap. I salute the DGA for dissing "Children" in its nominations, which were released earlier this week, but I'm revolted that it did nominate "Dreamgirls," which is close to one of the worst films of 2006. They may have well have nominated "Eragon" and "Scary Movie 4."