ShareThisCOVER LETTER: "Yo, I'm spunky! Ha-ha!"
We see that.
A pinch of personality goes a long way when it comes to your resume and cover letter. While having a good sense of humor can be helpful when you meet with a hiring manager in person, jokes don't always translate well on paper. A playful attitude could come across as cavalier. Tongue-in-cheek sarcasm might be regarded as rude. An attempt at lighthearted self-deprecation can be interpreted as a lack of self-confidence.
If there's any question about how a comment could be construed, play it safe and take a more direct approach. These job seekers didn't:
COVER LETTER: "I can be a jerk, but I would love to work for you. LOL."
We're not laughing.
CONTACT INFORMATION: "The moon."
Let us guess, you live there because your skills are "out of this world," right?
"SALARY REQUIREMENTS: 60K. I'm worth all that -- and a bag of chips."
We'll make sure the vending machine is fully stocked.
"ACCOMPLISHMENTS: When I was 8, a Frisbee flew into my backyard, and I blew it up with my mind."
We're speechless.
If you include an objective statement on your resume, make sure it clearly explains how your career goals and qualifications align with a prospective employer's needs. These applicants missed the mark:
"OBJECTIVE: To get a long-term stable job. I also want a dog that I'll name Elizabeth and a white BMW Z4 convertible."
Who's going to do the driving, you or Elizabeth?
"OBJECTIVE: To be around when overtime is needed."
Can you be available during regular working hours, too?
Finally, no matter how badly you want a job, attempts at bribery -- even in jest -- will not help you get hired. One recent candidate tried to sweet-talk hiring managers with the promise of homemade banana bread and snickerdoodle cookies. Here's another peculiar proposition:
COVER LETTER: "I used to sell exotic birds. I can get you one if you hire me."
A truly birdbrained offer.
For more Resumania, and to submit samples you've come across, visit www.resumania.com. Keep the Resumania coming. Examples can be sent to Resumania, c/o Robert Half International, 2884 Sand Hill Road, Suite 200, Menlo Park, Calif., 94025, or faxed to 650-234-6998. Max Messmer is chairman and CEO of Robert Half International, a specialized staffing firm.
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