Funniest Scenes Ever

I sat through "Blood and Chocolate" last night, a werewolf love story that's as awful and stupid as the title suggests. I do congratulate it, however, on having two of the funniest scenes I've seen in a long time. One involves a werewolf who says grace right before he starts to chomp some human flesh. He may be a vile monster, but at least he's thankful to God about the food which he's about to receive. The other has the hero running in the forest, attempting to find a river. He happens upon a little creek, and he exclaims "A creek! Creeks flow into rivers!"

It seems that most of the funniest scenes in movies are unintended. With that in mind, I present the four funniest moments in movie history. Each of these makes it worth buying the DVD of the films just to be able to watch the parts over and over again. Or maybe it's just me...

4. THANK YOU in "Half Baked"
This makes no sense and has no reason at all to be funny, but I crack up every time. It's right at the beginning of the movie, in the opening montage in which Thurgood (Dave Chappelle) introduces his friends' careers. Kenny (Harland Williams), a kindergarten teacher, compliments one of his kid's on a drawing he made. Listen for the way the kid says "thank you" in an unnaturally squeaky voice. So, so, great. The little tyke is a comic genius, and he delivers the line even better than Dana Carvey did in "Wayne's World."

3. MESSENGER BIRD in "The Mummy Returns"
For a long time during this boring, boring movie, characters keep sending each other messages via carrier pigeon. Each time the pigeon delivers a new message, someone unfurls this tiny little scroll of paper and reads it to himself with a serious look on their face. This alone is funny enough, but it gets even better. Eventually, a villain spots the pigeon in the air, and in a long, drawn-out sequence, he lifts a rifle, aims oh so carefully, gets the bird in his sites, just follows it for a while, and then BAM! down falls the little birdie. The first time I saw this I was with two friends at a press screening in Phoenix, and we laughed about it for at least an hour. Everyone around us kept shooting back dirty looks, but we couldn't stop laughing no matter what. I thought we were going to get kicked out of the theater.

2. CAR SMACK in "Reefer Madness"
Some of the worst stunt acting in the history of film makes for one of the great accidental comedic performances. After little Jimmy is all hopped up on Reefer and taking his dealer for a ride, he slams his car into an old man trying to cross the street. He plops to the ground as if he's a hot air balloon that's just been deflated.

1. FLYING TRAPEZE in "It Happened One Night"
In a spontaneous musical number set on a bus, a flamboyant sailor pops up from out of nowhere and starts singing "The Man on the Flying Trapeze." The guy's inflections and gestures are priceless, and he kicks it up a few notches by entering the aisle, lifting himself up by the hand rails and swinging back and forth. This guy is in THE ZONE. There's probably something politically incorrect at finding this hilarious, but I don't even care. Even thinking about it makes me laugh as I type. More people need to discover this.