Q: I'm not a picky eater, but recently I was at a restaurant and my meal was inedible. There was way too much salt. I thought about sending it back, but it was a nice restaurant, and I didn't want to make a scene. When and how should you send food back?
A: When: As soon as you know you can't eat it. With an overcooked steak or an extremely salty dish, that should be pretty clear after your first bite. If you wait till you're nearly done, it'll look like you just want the restaurant to give you a free meal. Obviously, if you find something nasty (e.g., a bug or a hair) toward the end of your meal, that's different, but you should still speak to the waiter right away.
How: Nicely. Don't get belligerent, and if it's something unappetizing, don't speak so loudly that the rest of the room gets queasy. In your case, you'd say, "I'm sorry, but I'd like to send this back. It's too salty to eat."
Now, remember, the chef isn't responsible for you simply not liking something that actually was prepared correctly. If you hate goat's cheese, but order a pizza with chevre because you forgot chevre is goat's cheese, you shouldn't send it back.
Q: Do people really have to gnaw on those ginormous turkey legs while strolling through theme parks? Ew.
A: There is no way to eat one of those without looking like a caveman. However, lots of people think they're delicious, so don't expect them to go away anytime soon. If you do partake of the mother of all turkey legs, please sit down while you enjoy it -- if you wander about, you're probably going to drip grease on unsuspecting strangers, and that's not a souvenir anyone wants to bring home.
Q: We went on vacation this summer with our small kids and a gay couple was right next to us at the beach. They kept kissing and talking about their wedding -- apparently they were honeymooning. I didn't appreciate them carrying on like that in front of my kids, who had all sorts of questions. I know gay marriage is legal in some states, but is that really appropriate?
A: No couple -- gay or straight -- should engage in extreme public displays of affection (PDA). But I mean PDA of the "Come on, people, get a room" variety; it doesn't sound like this was anywhere close to that. And seriously -- would you have had a problem with a straight couple on their honeymoon kissing and talking about their wedding? In my opinion, you're massively overreacting.
(E-mail travel-etiquette questions to Lesley Carlin at deartripadvisor(at)tripadvisor.com.)
(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service, http://www.scrippsnews.com)
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