An Actual Phone Conversation With a Reader

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CALLER: Hey Phil, do you watch "Ebert & Roeper"?

ME: Yes.

CALLER: You should take a cue from them. They rated the new "X-Men" as the best one out of all the "X-Men." You only gave it one star.

ME: So you're telling me I should change my mind because Ebert and Roeper have a different opinion than me?

CALLER: You should study more.

ME: What do you recommend that I study that would make me like "X-Men" more?

CALLER: Some of your reviews are good, but most of them are awful.

ME: Sorry to disappoint you.

CALLER: OK, bye.

ME: Thanks for calling.

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Border crossing

They come north to make better money, we go south for cheaper prices....go figure!

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