By MARK PATINKIN, The Providence Journal

America Online had a compelling feature last week called "The Top 25 Things We Wish Would Make a Comeback," including drive-ins, Pogo, Green Stamps and Coke in bottles.Today, I'm here to round out that list.They left out some important ones.

I think I'm becoming my father. He's constantly saying they don't make movies like they used to, then launching into a reverie about "Stagecoach," the 1939 version; now that was a flick.Well, the release of "Get Smart" in theaters has me thinking the same way."Get Smart" -- now that was a TV show; and from an era full of them.

In its five years, the war in Iraq has revealed a remarkable contrast. On the one hand, there's the impressive performance of the troops on the ground. On the other, there is the incompetence of those who sent them there.

A reader named Gerry Fernandez warned: "Get ready for the flood of nasty e-mails."He was right.A typical letter said simply: "Dear Mr. Patinkin: You're a sexist ... .""Wah Wah Wah!!!" wrote Maria Montaquila. "You sounded like a big weenie! I feel very sorry for your wife."

I'm about to breach a confidence here by sharing what a lot of men have been asking each other in private lately:What's up with middle-aged white women?Why are they so mad?No one likes to see their candidate lose, but the usual response is to feel let down.

I've never had much interest in "Sex and the City," though I've been forced to see parts of it. This happens when you live with females. At unexpected moments, usually the bottom of the ninth, they take over the television. Suddenly, the image would switch to four women in expensive footwear drinking cosmopolitans and talking about the subject that gave the show its name.

My 14-year-old son and I were having our usual issue. I wanted CNN but he preferred MTV's "Rob and Big.'' That's a reality show about a huge black guy named Big and a short white guy named Rob.

The next time you're on a weeklong bike trip in cooler weather, never end the day at an inn that's on high ground. Beginning downhill on a cold morning will leave you doubly frozen. Far better to start each day on an uphill so you can warm up.I gave that advice to someone the other day, not because I'm an expert; I learned it years ago in an interview.

I try hard to celebrate the successes of others, but I'm miffed that a Philadelphia columnist is far richer than I am because he wrote about his dog before I wrote about mine. His name is John Grogan, and not only was his book "Marley and Me" a huge best seller, now there's a movie based on the book starring Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson.

In the cold days of early January, when Hillary Rodham Clinton's war chest still overshadowed Barack Obama's, I got an unexpected e-mail.