By DEROY MURDOCK, Scripps Howard News Service

Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner nearly struck out Wednesday morning despite multiple opportunities to defend the dollar. Geithner's narrowly averted gaffe was sadly typical, given the greenback's shabby treatment these days.

"Since when is the secret ballot a basic tenet of democracy?" Teamsters President James Hoffa recently demanded. He callously dismissed this cornerstone of American self-government that helped emancipated slaves vote after the Civil War and has decided presidential elections since Grover Cleveland beat Benjamin Harrison in 1892.

Senator Arlen Specter's support for the 1,071-page Obama-Pelosi-Reid "stimulus" package will cost taxpayers $787 billion. That vote may cost the Pennsylvania Republican his job.

Traditional-marriage defenders claim that gay marriage jeopardizes husbands and wives. It's as if when two Massachusetts men wed, they exchange 24-karat-gold crowbars, all the better to pry straight couples apart.

Geert Wilders landed at London's Heathrow Airport last February 12. He was removed from a British Midlands jet from Amsterdam that afternoon, his arms gripped by two border agents. Wilders was whisked to a holding area, confined for three hours, and denied access to a British legislator waiting to welcome him.

Last Labor Day, the thought of nationalizing banks was alien, if not seditious. Today, some argue for bank expropriation. Bafflingly, this advice comes not from Communists, but from Republicans.

President Barack Obama would lose his quiet struggle against nicotine addiction if he dispatched the Secret Service to score him a carton of Camels. So why is Obama fighting Washington's addiction to debt by...sinking Washington deeper into debt?

President Barack Obama should learn from his tumultuous struggle to drag his reputed stimulus measure through Congress. Rather than let House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid craft major bills, Obama should offer specific proposals and have his allies push them toward adoption.

So-called "global warming" has shrunk from problem to punch line. And now, Leftists are laughing, too. It's hard not to chuckle at the idea of Earth boiling in a carbon cauldron when the news won't cooperate:

Item: Amid crisp breezes and bright sunshine, Barack Obama took the presidential oath Tuesday afternoon, to the thunderous applause of his supporters, the cautious hopes of the loyal opposition, and the well wishes of all Americans.