By BETSY HART, Scripps Howard News Service

I'm increasingly convinced that today when it comes to matters of the heart, too many women ask for too much and settle for too little.

It's been a little over a year now since my friend "Denise" (not her real name) discovered her husband's longstanding infidelity. Married over 20 years with children still at home, she experienced the betrayal like one might a hurricane.

But more than a year later, she and her husband are still standing. And they are doing it together.

Really, social conservatives? Really?

I thought that, to us, private lives matter and character counts. Oh, and the media are supposed to go after a candidate's history when it might tell us something about the person. Of course, let's not forget what a terrible thing it is to employ a "nuts and sluts" strategy to automatically undermine women accusing a candidate of sordid behavior.

It continues to amaze me that women in the Western world have babies at all today.

Why? Because of the excruciatingly painful -- and very loud -- way that childbirth is almost always portrayed by Hollywood. My girls are already terrified at the prospect.

I wonder if we need to start experiencing marriage more like we experience life with our children.

That occurred to me as I read "You Never Marry the Right Person," the provocative essay by pastor-theologian Timothy Keller. With his wife Kathy, he's the author of "The Meaning of Marriage," from which the recent piece in relevantmagazine.com is excerpted. Keller writes:

What does it mean to be "healed" and ready for a relationship? Any relationship?

Inevitably when the year ends, we are treated to a list of new words that have regularly entered the lexicon in the previous 365 days. This year "Tebowing" -- to get down and pray regardless of what others are doing -- is new to the language.

Well, at the beginning of 2012, I suggest reintroducing a marvelous and helpful word into usage in the year ahead: suitor.

Constructively ignore my kids to get them on the path to good behavior?

Well, that's a big part of a new parenting technique gaining a lot of traction, at least according to a recent Wall Street Journal piece, "Tantrum Tamer: New Ways Parents Can Stop Bad Behavior" by Shirley S. Wang. As Wang describes it, the new approach, "parent-management training," is proving effective.

My four children -- the youngest is already 10 -- are now beyond the "little kid" toy range when it comes to Christmas lists. Case in point: The youngest opened her list this year by asking for an iPhone 4S (not a chance, honey). And then, a page of requests later, she closes with: "remember, this will be a fun Christmas if everyone gets what they would like."

It's not that I'm overly wedded to the idea of celebrating something called "Christmas" on Dec. 25.